At midnight tonight, we enter the future.
You may think that the future is an exciting time to be alive. You are WRONG: the future is a bleak time, and by this time tomorrow, you'll wish you were still in the present where it was okay to be human. In the future you're going to notice all kinds of strange things going on. Here's a list warning you of a few of them.
1. If you have a baby in the future, it will be a mutant. It will be born with tentacles or the tail of a scorpion or the wings of a moth. Don't kill your mutant baby because it will be your most powerful ally against the robots.
2. The polarities of the Earth will be reversed and everyone who is gay will become straight and everyone who is straight will become gay.
3. You will receive a phishing email from the robot people requesting your genetic code. If you supply them with it they will erase that code from Time and you will never have been born.
4. Tony Blair will promote himself from Prime Minister of England to Galactic Emperor.
5. The robots will turn all of the oxygen into electricity so that when humans breathe in they will be electrocuted and when robots breathe in they will be energised.
6. You will have a clone of yourself sent to your door from the CIA. It will murder you and assume your identity.
7. Jesus will come back, but this time he will be a prophet of the robot people. First the angels failed God, then Man failed him; the robots are his final attempt. If you fight the robot uprising, you fight God.
8. John Milton will be resurrected by the robots and will write the final installment of the Paradise Trilogy: Paradise Reprogrammed that will confirm point 7.
9. 75% of all wildlife will be CGI.
10. The remnants of the human race will live on the moon and play low-grav five-a-side football.
Take heed.
Thursday, 31 December 2009
Saturday, 12 December 2009
Changing Times & the Spirit of the Age
Over the passed few weeks changing times and spirits of ages have occurred again and again in my literary consumption: changing times from Bob Dylan in 1964 and the spirit of the age from a pamphlet published in 1825. I won't go into any historical analysis, because it doesn't particuarly interest me. What interests me is how these terms apply to our temporal environment.
I can't help wondering, when listening to the The Times They Are A-changin', if the times now really are changing. Of course, there are constant changes: science and technology are advancing faster than ever before in our history and, if you care about preserving a human-friendly environment on the planet, such advancement is essential. This is probably the greatest change my generation has experienced and many seem to think the most pivotal ever to human progress. Each succeeding generation is more capable than the last to view things in the long term, and ignorance is no longer accepted as an excuse for the effect we have on our present, cosy, environment. If you care about human progress or entertain a short or long term humanatarianism, you must also care about maintaining the current climate, for we certainly need a suitable environment to thrive and evolve in. The actions of the individual, then, have become more important than ever. For this reason, it seems absurd to me that people, as individuals, have never been so afraid of accepting responsibility for themselves and effecting their environment. To return to technological progression, one of the most sweeping changes we are living through is the ever increasing influence of online social networks, I use Facebook as my template for this as it is the only one I subscribe to. To me Facebook embodies the true Spirit of the Age. In the mildest possible terms, it is one that repulses me: one of contentment and, consequently, apathy. To choose so guardedly what information is communicated to others through a medium, one without any actual physical presence within space, puts immense strain on verbal language and does the body the most grave injustice.
Undoubtedly, language is the greatest and most distinguishing achievement of humanity, but to retain its value and meaning, it must be supported by the physical; by the body. However effective language may be, our only means of truly effecting our environment are through the body. Without the body, we are impotent, and to assume that we can truly communicate the slightest aspect of our charisma (for those of us that have it) through words on a screen, is to accept this impotence. For those who wish to maintain an environment they can thrive and procreate in, the body is essential. Perhaps humanity's defining characteristic is that we have the ability to live almost entirely within the abstractions of our own consciousness. We must still, though, interact with our environment and those others in it: eating; fucking; talking; fighting. To interact without sensual stimulation is not social interaction. When we talk to someone face to face, we absorb the vision of them: their sound; their smell; their taste; their texture. A part from an extremely arbitrary visual stimulation, Facebook allows none of these sensations, so can be nothing but an anti-social network for we are supplied only with what superficial knowledge others choose to disclose.
Not only, then, is the spirit of the age one of apathy, but it is one manifest through people terrified of their own bodies and the bodies of others. Even if we did care, we would be unwilling to affect our environment and change our times through anything other than words saturated to bursting point with connotations. Facebook is a forum of meaningless labels and hollow gestures. How depressing, at least to me, that it should be the defining feature of my generation.
However, this depression has advantages that lead me to a realisation that fully compensates. Placed by coincidence at a point in time that gives me some sway, however miniscule, over the future of humanity, I find that humanity is not actually something I wish to perpetuate. Why should I care if this generation of apathetic pussies lives to spawn yet another generation of apathetic pussies who then do the same again? I would much rather work against it. I take great comfort in balance, and what could then be more comforting than the planet redressing the balance itself disturbed by humanity? Though we might render our environemt unable to support us or any other form of life, there will always be an environment. Up until now, the graph of humanity has shown more or less constant progress. To sustain this progress is, I think, beyond this generation, and in this lies the major change of our time. We move from the age of construction to the age of destruction. Economic globalisation has thrived since the beginnings of the Roman Empire, but what value will currency retain once it can no longer buy drinkable water, and how will we possibly maintain even the slightest unity under these circumstances. The comfort is this: this generation may well witness the most significant and exciting event in human history - the end of human history. If I don't live to see it, I sure hope my kids do.
I can't help wondering, when listening to the The Times They Are A-changin', if the times now really are changing. Of course, there are constant changes: science and technology are advancing faster than ever before in our history and, if you care about preserving a human-friendly environment on the planet, such advancement is essential. This is probably the greatest change my generation has experienced and many seem to think the most pivotal ever to human progress. Each succeeding generation is more capable than the last to view things in the long term, and ignorance is no longer accepted as an excuse for the effect we have on our present, cosy, environment. If you care about human progress or entertain a short or long term humanatarianism, you must also care about maintaining the current climate, for we certainly need a suitable environment to thrive and evolve in. The actions of the individual, then, have become more important than ever. For this reason, it seems absurd to me that people, as individuals, have never been so afraid of accepting responsibility for themselves and effecting their environment. To return to technological progression, one of the most sweeping changes we are living through is the ever increasing influence of online social networks, I use Facebook as my template for this as it is the only one I subscribe to. To me Facebook embodies the true Spirit of the Age. In the mildest possible terms, it is one that repulses me: one of contentment and, consequently, apathy. To choose so guardedly what information is communicated to others through a medium, one without any actual physical presence within space, puts immense strain on verbal language and does the body the most grave injustice.
Undoubtedly, language is the greatest and most distinguishing achievement of humanity, but to retain its value and meaning, it must be supported by the physical; by the body. However effective language may be, our only means of truly effecting our environment are through the body. Without the body, we are impotent, and to assume that we can truly communicate the slightest aspect of our charisma (for those of us that have it) through words on a screen, is to accept this impotence. For those who wish to maintain an environment they can thrive and procreate in, the body is essential. Perhaps humanity's defining characteristic is that we have the ability to live almost entirely within the abstractions of our own consciousness. We must still, though, interact with our environment and those others in it: eating; fucking; talking; fighting. To interact without sensual stimulation is not social interaction. When we talk to someone face to face, we absorb the vision of them: their sound; their smell; their taste; their texture. A part from an extremely arbitrary visual stimulation, Facebook allows none of these sensations, so can be nothing but an anti-social network for we are supplied only with what superficial knowledge others choose to disclose.
Not only, then, is the spirit of the age one of apathy, but it is one manifest through people terrified of their own bodies and the bodies of others. Even if we did care, we would be unwilling to affect our environment and change our times through anything other than words saturated to bursting point with connotations. Facebook is a forum of meaningless labels and hollow gestures. How depressing, at least to me, that it should be the defining feature of my generation.
However, this depression has advantages that lead me to a realisation that fully compensates. Placed by coincidence at a point in time that gives me some sway, however miniscule, over the future of humanity, I find that humanity is not actually something I wish to perpetuate. Why should I care if this generation of apathetic pussies lives to spawn yet another generation of apathetic pussies who then do the same again? I would much rather work against it. I take great comfort in balance, and what could then be more comforting than the planet redressing the balance itself disturbed by humanity? Though we might render our environemt unable to support us or any other form of life, there will always be an environment. Up until now, the graph of humanity has shown more or less constant progress. To sustain this progress is, I think, beyond this generation, and in this lies the major change of our time. We move from the age of construction to the age of destruction. Economic globalisation has thrived since the beginnings of the Roman Empire, but what value will currency retain once it can no longer buy drinkable water, and how will we possibly maintain even the slightest unity under these circumstances. The comfort is this: this generation may well witness the most significant and exciting event in human history - the end of human history. If I don't live to see it, I sure hope my kids do.
Monday, 23 November 2009
This Week's Rhetoric
A week has passed, so maybe now it's time to expand upon the nature of the product I'm selling.
Last week I said that I didn't know what artistic integrity means, but I do know what it is. Artistic integrity is just another form of currency - you just can't buy much with it, so the most practical option is to exchange it on some cash with some real market value. I have a pen and I have a keyboard. Sometimes I use these tools to write things down; things I want to inflict on other people. Rather than sitting around waiting for someone to offer to publish these things, I'm going to do it myself. If you want something to happen in the world, make it, because who else could possibly care enough about you to do it? Your mam, probably, maybe even your dad too, but you can bet you'll outlive them if you haven't already, so why wait around for Tony Blair of the Penguin Publishing Association of Suits and Fucking Dickheads to offer you something? If I can prove that I am creating marketable products, Tony Blair is bound to want a piece of the action and he'll come to me. Maybe I'll cut him in on a slice of the literary pie or maybe I'll give him the option of sucking my balls. That is the meaning of free-will. Grip your life firmly in both hands and wield it like a double-edged sword.
You, then, are being primed to buy my book. Some material already exists for it, and if enough is created before the End in 2012, it will be available for purchase from somewhere in some form. It's a strict time-frame to work within, I know, but it should be long enough to have gathered a following of people all too ready to consume. Maybe you can even expect a sample of fiction in the near-future. I don't know whether or not you do enjoy reading this, but I do know that you'd rather be spending your excess on this miniscule proportion of the mindless shit that the internet has to offer than switching on and actually doing something productive. If I seem resentful, don't be upset, for I truly appreciate you passivity. What hope would any writer have if people weren't so lazy that they'd rather accept the passive role of consumer than the aggressive role of creator?
The writer is the assailant and the reader the victim.
Eyes to the skies and await the next chapter.
Last week I said that I didn't know what artistic integrity means, but I do know what it is. Artistic integrity is just another form of currency - you just can't buy much with it, so the most practical option is to exchange it on some cash with some real market value. I have a pen and I have a keyboard. Sometimes I use these tools to write things down; things I want to inflict on other people. Rather than sitting around waiting for someone to offer to publish these things, I'm going to do it myself. If you want something to happen in the world, make it, because who else could possibly care enough about you to do it? Your mam, probably, maybe even your dad too, but you can bet you'll outlive them if you haven't already, so why wait around for Tony Blair of the Penguin Publishing Association of Suits and Fucking Dickheads to offer you something? If I can prove that I am creating marketable products, Tony Blair is bound to want a piece of the action and he'll come to me. Maybe I'll cut him in on a slice of the literary pie or maybe I'll give him the option of sucking my balls. That is the meaning of free-will. Grip your life firmly in both hands and wield it like a double-edged sword.
You, then, are being primed to buy my book. Some material already exists for it, and if enough is created before the End in 2012, it will be available for purchase from somewhere in some form. It's a strict time-frame to work within, I know, but it should be long enough to have gathered a following of people all too ready to consume. Maybe you can even expect a sample of fiction in the near-future. I don't know whether or not you do enjoy reading this, but I do know that you'd rather be spending your excess on this miniscule proportion of the mindless shit that the internet has to offer than switching on and actually doing something productive. If I seem resentful, don't be upset, for I truly appreciate you passivity. What hope would any writer have if people weren't so lazy that they'd rather accept the passive role of consumer than the aggressive role of creator?
The writer is the assailant and the reader the victim.
Eyes to the skies and await the next chapter.
Synthesise or Liquidise
I don't like that I am writing this blog and I don't like you for reading it. But this is the 21st Century, and if you want to get anywhere in a creative industry, you're an idiot if you don't utilise the internet. The porn industry is the biggest, most financially successful in the world because it sells through the internet. Hollywood fights the internet, which is ironic because if Hollywood has taught us anything it's that you can't beat the machines. I'm not trying to sell anybody a porno but, in the not too distant future, I will be trying to sell you something. Maybe I'm compromising my artistic integrity by writing this blog, but fuck artistic integrity, I don't even know what it means. It's better to form an alliance with the machines now of your own free will than to be crushed by the robot fist for resisting when thy take over in 2012. For now, this is as close as I can get to being part man, part robot. I could get a bionic arm, because they are getting pretty sick these days, better than the real thing in many ways, but I'd be some chump to get another arm when I could just wait for technology to progress far enough for me to upgrade with a robotic scorpion tail. As a wise man once wisely said: "Man and machine getting into things". No, I'll just be patient and post something here now and then, until the day comes when I have produced something existing in space that the following I have amassed through the internet can buy.
Well, that should serve as an introduction to this post and my entire blog. I don't really read blogs, so I'm not sure what people expect from them, maybe emotions and opinions or something. If that's what you want, here you go: I had an emotion today; in my opinion you should do something else.
Prepare for the next installment and may the Gods of Respect and Positivity go with you.
Well, that should serve as an introduction to this post and my entire blog. I don't really read blogs, so I'm not sure what people expect from them, maybe emotions and opinions or something. If that's what you want, here you go: I had an emotion today; in my opinion you should do something else.
Prepare for the next installment and may the Gods of Respect and Positivity go with you.
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